An Albert Clark Christmas

Little Christmas Story






When four of Albert Clark's elves got sick, the trainee elves did not produce toys as fast as the regular ones, and Albert began to feel the Pre-Christmas pressure.
Then Mrs. Clark told Albert her Mother was coming to visit, which stressed Albert even more.
When he went to harness the reindeer, he found that three of them were about to give birth and two others had jumped the fence and were out, Heaven knows where.
Then when he began to load the sleigh, one of the floorboards cracked, the toy bag fell to the ground and all the toys were scattered.
Frustrated, Albert went in the house for a cup of apple cider and a shot of rum. When he went to the cupboard, he discovered the elves had drunk all the cider and hidden the liquor.. In his frustration, he accidentally dropped the cider jug, and it broke into hundreds of little glass pieces all over the kitchen floor. He went to get the broom and found the mice had eaten all the straw off the end of the broom.
Just then the doorbell rang, and an irritated Albert marched to the door, yanked it open, and there stood Blake Cartwright with a great big Christmas tree.
Blake said very cheerfully, 'Merry Christmas, Albert. Isn't this a lovely day? I have a beautiful tree for you. Where would you like me to stick it?'
'UP YOUR ASS Cartwright!' replied Albert

And so began the tradition of Blake Cartwright on top of the Christmas tree.

Not a lot of people know this.

The Legend Lives !!!

Now thats Funny! Merry Christmas to all Albert Clark and Wild Pony too?

Who's Albert? Oh and I found this...
https://www.429-460.com/general-discussion-f5/albert-clark-christmas-card-t2702.htm?highlight=albert+clark

Blake did you get the POINT!!!!!!!!

Don't disrespect Albert...... He will come for you!

You's talking too meee.......You's talking too me...... thats it Tinkers on her way.

Albert's a good ole boy,he just don't take any shit.(From nobody)

bbf-falcon wrote:Albert's a good ole boy,he just don't take any shit.(From nobody)

Kinda Like ol John Wayne

merry christmas Albert clark

LOL....

so that's why the live tree's smell funny sometimes.

61coon wrote:

bbf-falcon wrote:Albert's a good ole boy,he just don't take any shit.(From nobody)

Kinda Like ol John Wayne toilet paper, don't take crap off no damn body

There fixed it for you Red...................

You boys just keep on laughin, it all fun and games until you get knocked out or knocked up by ole Albert.....................


Albert don't play.............. Pine tar is hell to wipe off ur butt.

IDT-572 wrote:You boys just keep on laughin, it all fun and games until you get knocked out or knocked up by ole Albert.....................


Albert don't play.............. Pine tar is hell to wipe off ur butt.

gives you that "not so fresh"feal! "tree topper"

IDT-572 wrote:Pine tar is hell to wipe off ur butt.

I don't even want to know how Blake knows this.....



Bill

billandlori wrote:

IDT-572 wrote:Pine tar is hell to wipe off ur butt.

I don't even want to know how Blake knows this.....



Bill

Read the Christmas story again and you will understand..................

I am glad that I don't get cards from Albert. You must have been a bad boy Blake.

jasonf wrote:I am glad that I don't get cards from Albert. You must have been a bad boy Blake.

I try realy hard to be good, but..................

jasonf wrote:I am glad that I don't get cards from Albert. You must have been a bad boy Blake.

Be careful, Albert will come for you