Questions that are haunting….
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Questions that are haunting….
Larry Williams September 29th 2009, 8:04 am
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
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Can you cry under water?
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How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
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Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
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Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
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Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
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What disease did cured ham actually have?
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How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
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Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
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If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
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Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
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Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
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Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.
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Why is "bra"singular and "panties" plural?
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Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
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If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
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Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
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If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
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Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They're both dogs!
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If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
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If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
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If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
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Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
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Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
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Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
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Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Can you cry under water?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What disease did cured ham actually have?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why is "bra"singular and "panties" plural?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They're both dogs!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Larry Williams- Posts : 884
Join date : 2009-08-08
Age : 79
Location : Wallacetown Ontario
Re: Questions that are haunting….
the Coug September 29th 2009, 8:56 am
when you buy hot dogs they come 10 to a pack and the buns are 8 to a pack?
why is it every time you are in hurry every one else on the road is in slow motion?
why is it every time you drive down the street some SOB always pulls out and in front of you in your lane, so you have to slam on your brakes?
if psychics can tell you about your future and past why do they ask for your name and birth date?
if Psychics can see the future why don't they pick the right lotto numbers?
if psychics can predict things why do they call you when they know you don't give a shyt about talking to them already?
why can't these freaking tellamarketers understand the word NO?
why do steel siding people always call a couple times a year to ask if you want your brick home sided?
why is it every time I get a good sleep going on someone calls the wrong Number in the middle of the night and wakes me up????
why is it every kid growing up hears their parents, say I walked 10 mile to school and back every day in the snow 3 ft deep up hill both ways???? bare footed
Randy
why is it every time you are in hurry every one else on the road is in slow motion?
why is it every time you drive down the street some SOB always pulls out and in front of you in your lane, so you have to slam on your brakes?
if psychics can tell you about your future and past why do they ask for your name and birth date?
if Psychics can see the future why don't they pick the right lotto numbers?
if psychics can predict things why do they call you when they know you don't give a shyt about talking to them already?
why can't these freaking tellamarketers understand the word NO?
why do steel siding people always call a couple times a year to ask if you want your brick home sided?
why is it every time I get a good sleep going on someone calls the wrong Number in the middle of the night and wakes me up????
why is it every kid growing up hears their parents, say I walked 10 mile to school and back every day in the snow 3 ft deep up hill both ways???? bare footed
Randy
the Coug- Posts : 3055
Join date : 2008-12-02
Old blue Racin Team- Posts : 1579
Join date : 2009-07-03
Age : 34
Location : North Carolina
Re: Questions that are haunting….
chuck stevens September 29th 2009, 11:34 am
If you "take a leak", how do you handle it and where do you put it? Same question for a Shyt.
chuck stevens- Posts : 299
Join date : 2009-08-06
Location : Beutiful uptown SOMIS, CA ELIMINATOR Dlr. -
Re: Questions that are haunting….
deerhunter3814 September 29th 2009, 7:51 pm
Why do they call a pair of pants a pair when there is only one? It is not because of two legs, a shirt has two sleeves but it is still a shirt.
deerhunter3814- Posts : 144
Join date : 2008-12-02
Location : Blue Grass State
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